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This story originally I wrote in Bahasa Indonesia and contained two very long shot. I tried to translate to English with six short chapters include the epilogue. Since English isn’t my mother language, no wonder if there are the bad grammar.
I “borrowed” Broken Changmin – Ga In character in this story
So, here you are. Hope you like it :)

FF Title : Sorry, Cause I Love You
Genre : Romance, Angst
Author : 아야 비루나시아 (Aya BirunaXiah)
Desclaimer : Unfortunately, the TVXQ members is not mine, also the other Hallyu character. I just made the story line.
WARNING! : For all those Cassiopeia especially Minnie's lover, please god forbid first before reading this FF, It's just a story ... I Love You, Minnie ♥. ♥

Summary :

When love became the guilty feeling,
When loving became the sin,
But my love for you,
It’s too strong, strong enough to kill me from the deep inside of my heart...

The story was inspired by memories of a friend ....
*Changmin was 19th years old. He attended in 3rd semester college. He's fallin' love with his own brother's fiancee.
*Geun Yeong was 18th years old. She was Changmin's best friend since Elementary School. She quitly fallin' love with Changmin.
*Ga In was 24th years old. She was Jung Hoon's fiancee.
*Jung Hoon was 29th years old. He was Changmin's half brother.
*Junsu was 19th years old, Changmin's best friend. He was fallin' love with Geun Yeong.
*Da Hae was 25th years old. She was Jung Hoon new secretary.
*Yoochun, Jaejoong and Yunho were 19th years old. They're also Changmin's and Geun Yeong's best friend.

Chapter 1 : Beloved Friend

Geun Yeong dragging her small suitcase into the lobby of Incheon airport. Her eyes kept looking for everywhere - if the person who would pick her up was between the bustle of the airport which a bit crowded because of people who wanted to holiday abroad or just out of the province. It was indeed the beginning of summer vacation. She returned to Seoul, also to spend the summer with her best friend since the children.
Since the elementary school to junior high school she was always classmated with her friend in Seoul, their parents were also neighbouring. But because of her father who worked at the embassy was transferred to Japan, Geun Yeong follodew to move to Japan.
Although the distance between Japan - Korea is not so far, but she did not miss it feel to have a long chat with her friend, a friend who's still make her fall in love. So, every month or school holidays, she would return to Seoul, her father bought her an apartment next door to her friend's brother's apartment building. He lived with his brother for the reasons that it's closer to his campus. Yes, she and her beloved friend both are now in college, they're each stepped on the third semester - respectively.
"Aish, where the hell is he? If he didn't say that he would pick me up from the beginning, I just go home alone with a taxi. Don't need to looking for and waiting like this!" the cute girl's mouth continued to nag. Occasionally she looked at her watch, a few minutes she was sitting - standing anxiously waiting for someone whom she thought would welcome her at the arrival gate earlier.
"Geun Yeong~aa, Geun Yeong ~ aaaaa!" a tall guy came with half running from the direction of the airport gate, was waved his hands and shouted calling with the distinctive high voice, made a few pairs of eyes there turned to him.
"Aish! You've made me ill feel to waiting for, now you even shout as a Tarzan, embarrasing!!" he grumbled, before the tall guy was 'arrested' and held it arrived - arrived.
"Geun Yeong ~ aaaa ..., I miss youuuuuuu," said the young man huged her tightly.
"Kya ... Changminnie, don't be like this. Uuugh ... aaaah, I can't breath huh!" Yeong Geun replied.
"Oh... he...he...., mian. Cause I miss you so bad, my tiny fiend." Changmin let go off his embrace and turn scrambles her hair softly.
"Kyaaaa.... you, just don't act like this, shame huh! I wasn't a child anymore!" Geun Yeong groused.
"Kaja," Changmin right hand seize Geun Yeong's suitcase and his left hand around the girl's shoulder, took her to the parking area.

"Where have you been?! I've waited until the moldy, huh!" Geun Yeong muttered, glancing at Changmin who was behind the wheel, "You look really messy, you must be haven't take a bath, huh?" Geun Yeong looked at her friend, his hair still messy, like a wild uncombed.
"Eventhough how messy I am, but I'm still handsome, am I ?!" Changmin glanced, grinned narcissistic while ascending and lowering his eyebrows.
"Cish!" Geun Yeong sniggered, she glanced at Changmin who's still focusing of driving,
"How are Junsu oppa, Yun oppa, Chun oppa, and Jae oppa? Did you often meet them lately?" Geun Yeong asked for the others four friends during their junior high school which now has been dispersed - scatter due to college at the different campus.
"Oh, rarely," Changmin said simply. For some reason, her friend seemed more subdued than before. Usually, when she returned to Seoul, he always noisy talking about whatever, along the road went on while driving.
"I'm hungry, Min! We just stop at our favourite local restaurant, ne? I really miss the Korean foods there," Geun Yeong continued, breaking the silence in the car.
Changmin still looks 'focused' staring at the road in front of him. But his thoughts wandered to everywhere. He didn't realize what Geun Yeong said, the restaurant that his best friend mentioned just passed by, and they had nearly entered the area where the apartments stated. The restaurant was indeed not far, only about 500 meters from their apartment.
"Gyaaaa! Changmin ~ aaaaa! We've passed it!" Geun Yeong started yelling at Changmin, who had been preoccupied itself with his 'own world'.
"Oh, uh... Passed, mwo??" Changmin was somewhat surprised by his friend scream.
"Aiiish, what's wrong with you?? You usually quick 'connected' when you heard the words about 'food' and 'restaurant'!"
"Why? You want to eat?"
"Oh Mai Got! Just connect already, oh may!"
"Where do you want to eat?"
"In the restaurant we usually went to!" Geun Yeong snapped irritably.
"O.K. boss. We'll turn back in front."
Geun Yeong could only sigh irritably, she has made a long wait, now tired speaking simply ignored instead.
As they arrived at the restaurant, Changmin still seems preoccupied with his own thoughts, he's no longer enthusiastic about ordering all his favourit menu. He just followed what the girl ordered.
"Minnie, what's wrong with you today, uh?? Such a strange!" asked Geun Yeong.
Changmin looked at the dish in front of him with the mind still wanders to everywhere.
"Kyaaa ...! Shim Changmiiiiin?!" shouted the girl.
"Oh... uh... Wae?" again and again, Chang Min shocked.
"You such a weird. Why?"
"Am I wierd?" Changmin pretended to enjoy his food.
"Kya, don't pretend to me. When did since you become filmed hobby?? What do you thinking about? Just tell me."
"A... amugeotdo anya," Changmin smiled a little.
"You also look thin now. Are you sick?"
"Oh ... come on! Just tell me!" said Geun Yeong while chewing her bulgogi.
"Amugeotdo anyarago. I'm okay."
"By the way, Jung Hoon oppa going to finished his conscription, right?"
"Okho ... okho!" Changmin suddenly cough when heard Geun Yeong asked it.
"Here, have a drink. See, i told you what, just don't filmed again," Geun Yeong thrusting the drinking water. He winced a bit strange to see her friend's behavior.
"Eh, ne. Hyeong will home this Wednesday," Changmin replied gulped after drinking the water, then he was carried away again with her own thoughts.
"Why did your expression looking so unhappy? Don't tell me that you don't like oppa come home," asked Geun Yeong, searchingly.
"Eiiiih, of course I'm happy after about three years left alone in his apartment," Changmin grinned a little nervous.
"Then, why did you seem not excited like that??"
"Mmmmh, nothing ... I just got headache just thinking about the college tasks that pile up..." Changmin pretended, "Yeah ... the tasks," he said still hiding nervousness.
"Do not lie me! It's the holiday season. After all, you're smart enough to mess around with the college tasks."
Changmin wasn't denied her anymore, he knew that Geun Yeong've memorized his motion.
"Geure ... mmmmh.... I'll tell you then, najunghae." Changmin still hesitant to open her mouth.
"All right then, you can tell me later at home," said Geun Yeong, "Mmmmhh, if oppa home, it's means there will be a wedding party soon, right? By the way, the prospective brides, Ga In eonni how's she going?"
"Okho ... okho!" Changmin coughed again, took a sip of water to drink again soon.
Geun Yeong knew it wasn't the ordinary cough, but the cough of shock. She began to stare searchingly companions.
"W. .. waeyo??" Changmin more nervously stared like that.
"Why did your act today, hell weird? Don't tell that you ...." Geun Yeong started wondering, "You... Do you still silently love eonni?"
Changmin didn't answer, he stopped to eat. He now looked down at the rest of the food in front of him, a blank stare.
"So, is it true??" Geun Yeong sighs, her heart felt sore again. She actually really loved her friend. She actually wants him to be more than friends, even with friendship no matter their relationship was so close. But Changmin silence fell in love with Han Ga In, his half brother's fiancee. He much loved the older woman, rather than herself who a few months younger than him.
No words, no more words were spoken from both, they still didn't speak until they reached the front door of the Geun Yeong's apartment.
"Just take a rest, Geun Yeong~aaa. You may be tired on the trip earlier. I go home first. If there are something you need, you know where I am."
"Won't you come in first?"
"Later, I'll be back here. I'm go home, see you. Annyeong," Changmin turned around, leaving Geun Yeong who looked to his back disappear behind the apartment hallway.

Posted via m.livejournal.com.

FanFic Title       :    You Are My Everything

Chapter             :    3/20

Genre               :    Romance, Friendship

Main Cast         :    Kim Junsu, Kim Jaejoong, Park Yoochun, Shim Changmin, Jung Yunho

Author              :    아야 비루나시아 (Aya BirunaXiah)


"Hyeong Odie?" Asked Changmin.

"Gonghange, I've just arrived. Waeyo? "Asked Yunho on the other side (loud speaker on).

"Hyeong, Junsuga.... Junsuga....  just passed away," said Changmin in the hard voice.

"Mwo?!!" Tuut ... tuuuuut! The phone lines suddenly closed.

Half an hour later the door opened, Yunho came with twisted facial expressions with the running breath. Watched the three of us then turns went  to Junsu's bedside.

"Gyaaa! Changmini! What did you say?!!"  Yunho look blushed after seeing Junsu who was still asleep with his innocent face and saw a small monitor that accompanied beating regularly.

"Mi... mianhae hyeong, we were forced to lie to you," Yoochun turns looked at me and Changmin.

"You're ridiculous! Why did you play with the news of death?! How if it's become real?!" said Yunho angrily, " You know what?!  Because of this, I almost had a car accident! "

"Mian hyeong," Changmin looked down.

"If not like this, will you come here soon?!" I exclaimed.

"Without  you ask me, I must be going right back here!"

"Oh yeah! Did you know why he's become like this?!!  He's sad because you've changed.  You know  what?! He really expect you to see his first musical show, but you didn't appear even when he's sick! Brother... anio! What kind of friend are you?! What kind of leader?!" for some reason I'm so cynical.

"Do you think I didn't try to come huh?! Do you think that only you who sad huh?!" Yunho face flushed.

"Come on hyeong, we're talking it calmly - well, mmh?" Changmin held Yunho's hand.

"Ne hyeong, mianhae,  this is my stupid idea. It's just a miss understanding," said Yoochun comfort him.

Yunho let go off Changmin's grasp and went out to shut the door a bit rough.

"I'll be back," Changmin follow Yunho out to pursue calm him.

"Jaejoong hyeong, he has come. Why do you became angry?" Yoochun muttered.

I did not answer, for some reason my thoughts become chaotic.

'Nut... nuut.... nuuuuuuuuut!' suddenly  the graphic of the small screen monitor turn to horizontal line and the sound of beating going faster and long shrill.

We are torn turned to Junsu.  Yoochun ran to call the doctor. Yunho and Changmin who haven't been far away in the corridor, soon right back. Several nurses came with the doctors, Junsu's heart beat rate graph going flat. They are trying to restore his heartbeat with the cardiac pacemaker device that gives me the creeps. For many times Junsu got the shock therapy, but his heartbeat graph stays flat.

"Euisanim, Junsuga eottohkeyo?"  Yunho asked, when the doctor left the Junsu's room.

"We almost lost him. His heartbeat had been halted, but now it's back, but the patient's condition is more critical now. We will continue to monitor him, please be supervised," explained the doctor, "Geureom," the white-uniformed men excused were followed by the nurses.

"Can you see now?! Because of hyeong both, he become more weak again! You both.... do you want to kill him?" Yoochun blame us.

I just looked cynically at Yunho who snorted down, then left the three of them passed in the corridor.


This morning I enjoyed breakfast with a cup exspresso and fish fillet sandwich at the hospital's cafetaria, and walking enjoy the fresh air in the park, of course with my fans incognito so as not to be identified. Although the fans quite understanding, not invade us to this hospital, I still have to carefull. Deception was also amused by today, the curly black wig, pink hat, and fake mustache thick.... ha.. ha... so funny!

After feel more refreshed, I immediately rushed back to Junsu's room. Last night I had to keep Junsu's turn, the lack of sleep as comfortable as in the hospital atmosphere, of course still not comfortable.

When I open the door, there was a nurse who shocked to realized that I came in, she almost breaking the vase on the shelf beside Junsu's bed.  A beautiful woman, shiny long black straight hair (He... he... looks like a shampoo commercials model), flushed white skin and tall posture. Hhmm, pretty well I thought.

"Uh, um... I'm the picket nurse today. I was assigned to check on patients and wiped his body this morning," he explained a little nervous, maybe it's her first moment  being looked by a celebrity at as pretty as me. Uh, i mean as handsime as me, " Geurom, excuse me. "

"Ne, gamsahamnida ganhosanim," I nodding respect.

The nurse brought straightening equipment and with a little nervous, she go out pushing a stainless pot, the typical container of warm water to wipe the patient. What a strange nurse, It's usually the nurses who care for Junsu not so nervous.  'Maybe he's one of our fans, including my fans,' I thought with narsissistic.

Uh, but.... Didn't Junsu's eoma  had 'special request' if the one who can wiping Junsu's body just  herself? Because Junsu's eoma well knowing that if Junsu knows his body 'bathed' by the others, especially female nurses, her beloved son would be embarrassed as hell.

There was a knock on the door, the doctor followed by a nurse, come to check Junsu's condition.

"Excuse me, I'll check Junsu ssi," said the doctor. I nodded respectfully and headed over to the couch, watched Junsu examined by the doctor and nurse.

"How was him, euisanim?" I asked.

"Patients are more stable now. We are just waiting for his unconscious. If you need something, Eun Woo ssi is a picket nurse today," the doctor introduced the nurse at his side.

"Well, is not there had been a new nurse who was checking?" I asked the nurse thought was beautiful.

"We've just checked right now," the doctor replied, "Well, I'll check again. Don't worry, we will ensure your privacy," doctors and nurses were excused.

"And then, who's the beautiful nurse? Stalker? Fans?" I mumbled still thinking of the first nurse. But I  thought it odd, the patients usually examined by doctors, not the nurses oneselves. And the attitudes of the beautiful nurse also seemed nervous, less professional. If he's not a nurse, then who is she? What was she doing to our Junsu? I was curious.


Junsu condition was turn back stable, but he still was not awake. I'm still quietly, doesn't speak with Yunho.

"Annyeong, how's Junsu hyeong? He's not woke up yet?" Changmin came immediately sat down beside me who had been sitting silently on the couch. Yunho was staring Junsu, sat by his bedside. Yoochun stand there looking it, then sat down beside me.

"He hasn't get up yet," I replied with my chin pointing towards Junsu's bed.

"Junsu~ya, we have succeeded. We are the first ranked again in the Japan's Top Chart. Come on you quickly get up," Yunho said, "I promise, if there is the spare time, we'll going to vacation to Bali together...." he continued, "Anio, we won't go to Bali, there's too crowded. I heard that  Indonesia has many other beautiful places, beautiful places that we could find many coconut trees. How....isn't it cool? Must be fun right?" the one who courted still doesn't flinch.

"Forgive me? Mianhae, the lately month I became busy by myself, I'm busy working hard for the sake of giving a gift to my young sister, to finance her got college in America. I can't see your big show, didnt' get to see you when you're sick. Mianhae, jeongmal mianhaeyo," Yunho tried to hold back the tears that were eventually dropped as well. During this time, as a leader, he had never seen shed a tear, unlike the easy 'untouchable' Yoochun. My heart surged see him cry.

"Mianhaeyo... jeongmal mianhaeyo, I can't take care of you again when you're sick. I really did not think if you so hurt like this.... that you so badly sad.... Mianhaeyo... " Yunho tears more unstoppable.

"Hyeong, mianhaeyo..." finally my ego faded. I went up to Yunho who was busy wiping the tears from his eyes with his sleeve. No words anymore that came out from my lips again, I just embraced it. Yoochun and Changmin walked over and joined our embrace. With not feel  back tears again, the four of us embraced. Not more word out from us, as if our hearts can hear each whisper of hearts with one another.

"Aaaarh," as we hugged each other like teletubis late, suddenly there're throaty voice that was barely audible surprise, we argued for a moment and reflexively look compact on Junsu. His slanting eyes slowly open, Yoochun and Changmin immediately move to the left side of his bed. We looked at Junsu and welcomed with smiles compact.

"Junsu~yaaaa?" I said.

"Annyeong?" Changmin waving hand cute, as Miss Korea.

"Jeongmal tahaengida," Yunho breathed a sigh of relief, raising the bed Junsu.

"Hey 'sleeping beauty' i have already want to kiss you, but you're up first," joked Yoochun.

Junsu looked at us in turn, views the rather strange and then closed his eyes again,  "Aaaargh!" with a frown

"Waeyo? Ajik aphayo?" asked Yunho.

Junsu looked back at us in turn, no a word escaped his lips. "Nuguseyo?" he asked innocently with a sound like a spoiled child.

The four of us minded, there's something wrong with the 'child', probably because of too much sleep.

"Please introduce... I'm U-Know Yunho, this is Hero Jaejoong, there are Micky Yoochun and the magnae Max Changmin. We are..... Dong Bang Shin Ki..." the leader spoke. Ne????

"Dong Bang... mwo??" asked the 'kids' were confused.

"Ajik mollayo??" Changmin said, "We are a famous boyband."

"Gya, Junsu! Do not you remember us??" Yoochun's turn.

"Junsu nugu? Naneun nuguseyo??" The boy still looked confused.

"Eeeh, do you still remember us singing, Mideoyo... " I tried to refresh his memory by singing a song Mideoyo.

"Sing? Uri??" Again and again he asked confused, making us more confused.

"He's really not remember us, even his self," I looked at YunYooMin frustrated.

"Hwaaaaa..., Junchanaaaa...," Yoochun suddenly flood of tears and hugged Junsu, we were joined 'swarm' Junsu.

"Aaaa.... aaah, heeeelp! I can not breathe," Junsu less breath as drowntrodden by the sacks of  wheat.

"Uh, mian... mian," we let go of the arms, back at each other, confused don't know what to do again, silence.

"Come on, let him rest. We call the doctor to examine him," Yunho said, "Yoochunaa, just call Junho that Junsu has wake up. But don't tell him first if Junsu lost his memories. "

"Ne," replied Yoochun lackluster.

"Euuu... kyang... kyang..., " there are suddenly the laughter familiar strange voice 'louding' across the room.

We looked at the child, worried that Junsu lost his mind too because he laughed himself like a crazy person. We're more confusion.

"I'm talented like Bae Yong June hyeong right??"

We looked at him didn't understood yet.

"Euuu... kyang... kyang! Do you think it's the soap operas, which there is amnesia events? Ha... ha... ha... bweo!" Junsu cute ass sticks out his tongue.

We yelled compact, "Mwo ?!!!" grared at Junsu.

"So you don't loose the memories huh?!" continued Yunho.

"How could I forget the bored of you," said Junsu again.

"Hyaaaa, you're sucks!"  Yoochun knocked Junsu's head in exasperation.

"Aaaah... APHA!" groaned Junsu spoiled, "Mian, I always hadn't chance to bullying you back. Now I got you all! He... he... he..."

So glad to see Junsu laughed again, our source of smile has returned to us. The doctor who examined his body organs, ensure that all good. He said that Junsu has to living through the recovery and rest about a week longer in this hospital, so that he could fully recovered.


"Junsuya, geugo arrayo? I once caught a female nurse on duty amit check and wipe your body," I thought back to 'the beautiful nurse', "But after checked the hospitals, the nurse is not there," I continued.

"Okho... okho!! " Junsu whom being fed by Yoochun coughing up the pieces of apple that had just bitten by him and 'override' to Changmin's face who was also sitting beside her bed.

"Aigoo hyeong," said Changmin while wiping his face.

"Jeongmal? How come you're not tell us," said Yunho.

"Well, I think anyway. After all, she has not appeared again and seemed to be no malicious intent on Junsu," I replied.

"Mmmh, maybe she's a fan who want to see the 'whole' of Junsu ha... ha... ha... " Yoochun teased, laughing.

"What do you mean by 'the whole'?!" asked Junsu spoiled.

"Yes, maybe he's really has wiped your body  that time," added Yoochun happy to see Junsu's face look that started to faintly pink.

"Andwaeeeeee ...! My body has wiped by another woman except  ne eoma? I even haven't been married yet!" Junsu covered his face with her palm.

"Do you know what, she was very beautiful! Just  really your ideal type. I also like her," I'm teasing.

"Oh no......! Where do I have to place my face? What a shame...Andwaeeeeee....! Eoma.... I'm not a 'virgin' anymore... hu... hu ......." act Junsu like a child.

"Just placed on the knee! Pabo...! Who do you think any woman who want to raped you the ugly man like you?! How overly confident you are ... huh!" once more time, Yoochun knocked Junsu's head.

Changmin laughed - hysterically, clutching his stomach. That's our youngest was the tallest of us, if he has laughed hard braking, transmissivity. Sometimes the things that 'crunchy' less funny even made him laugh.

"Hyeong, who has knew that Junsu already awake except us, family, and the doctors?" asked Changmin as sudden, trying to put the brakes on his laughter.

"Eopseoyo," Yunho replied, "Waeyo??"

Changmin pull Junsu and us closer to each other and commanding us to closer our face, making the circle 'formation', as the baseball players who was consulted the team's strategize.

"What if we ....."  he whispered was... wis... wus.... was.... wis... wus.... whispered doesn't clear at all.

"What the hell are you talking about?!" protested Yoochun.

"Oh, I haven't told yet... he.... he... just joked," Changmin grinned, "Well ....." he whispered something else.

"Aaah, great idea!" Yoochun nodded.

"That's good! Ok, I'll do it!" said Junsu pretentious 'Konglish' with his strange accent, his English really bad!

"Perhaps, it could work," Yunho response.

I just nodded in agreement, rather than got a lump he... he... he...☺


What will happens next chapter?
Who is the woman suspected of 'raped' Junsu?
Just look forward for the next story ^ _ ^ annyeong.


***to be continued…***

FanFic Title       :    You Are My Everything

Chapter             :    2/20

Genre               :    Romance, Friendship

Main Cast         :    Kim Junsu, Kim Jaejoong, Park Yoochun, Shim Changmin, Jung Yunho

Author              :    아야 비루나시아 (Aya BirunaXiah)


"Junsu~yaaaa! Junsu ireonaaa ....." I pat  Junsu's cheek (which is so cold).

"Jaejoong hyeong, what’s going on with him?? Her body was so cold. Is he die..... hiks ... hiks ... " YooChun cried.

I can not answer, holding Junsu's wrists and I had held my fingers on his neck,  "Still breathing, ppalli! We bring him to the hospital!"  without thinking, I'm holding Junsu again on my back, soon got into the car that drove by Yoochun.

Two doctors and several nurses look busy dealing with Junsu in the emergency room. Upon arrival at this hospital before, Yoocun and I even forgot  to disguise our identity in public. I don't throw attention to the people who watched 'celebrities' pass in front of them, even the cries of fans who happened to be there to scream hysterically, "Wae .... Junsu Oppa? Jeongmal aphayo??" some of them just cry. The only thing on my mind is Junsu.... Junsu... Junsu.... have to stay alive! I can't imagine when it comes to losing our dolphin, our 'rising sun' which always brings us joy in the middle - our center.

"Mworaguyo!! Junsu hyeong??!!!" Changmin screams beyond almost deafening my ears. Although I was a little angry because Changmin and Yunho wasn't come to cheer Junsu's performance stage at all, I am devastated my emotions and I called them both by giving the news of uri dolphin.

"Yeah, I try to steal the time to get there," said Changmin.

"Anyway you have to quickly come. Or you'll regret it forever!" I'm scared - frightening to Changmin trying to come. Actually myself was more afraid of it, 'andwae!!' I do not want to imagine the most bad possibility, 'He is strong! He must be stay alive!' try to comfort myself.

"Ye???!!"  Yunho no less shocked. For a moment there was no sound on the other side, like he was thinking his self, "Haiss, the schedule today really full!"

"So, do you think that we are just bothering you, right?!"  I'm so bitter. Why am I so mad huh? Though there is little relief to hear his voice when he sounded fine.

"Mwo?! What do you think I don't worry?! Do you think that I'm just thinking about myself right?!" Yunho was no less fierce.

"Majayo! Now you just think about yourself?" I more bitterly.

"Ah, why do you not understand my situation now ...." TUUUUT! I hung up without hearing the continuation of his words. I don't know what's wrong with me so I 'furious' when talking to him. I was angry because the lately time he rarely shared with us anymore… huh, but only when there is work together.

I sat down over a low Yoochun who has contacted Junsu's brother and parents while busy wiping tears with the back of his hand, staring at Junsu who was dealt by the doctors. My brother, this one, though self 'true namja' but also easy to cry. Despite the sad fact, but I was still able to hold back tears in public.

"Let's, we just wait outside. There won't be something bad happened to him," comfort him  as I hugged him to the bench in front of the ER.

"Junsu ssiga eotteohke, euisanim?" I asked the doctor who came out after dealing with Junsu.

"The patient has stable, luckily he fast brought here. But he has not regained consciousness, now we just wait it out while waiting for the results of the further tests," replied the doctor.

"Gamsahamnida euisanim,"  we are bow grateful.

Junsu should be in intensive care but with few considerations, he finally moved to a private treatment room. The doctor said, the pain had become increasingly weakened by making too much fatigue, and the mental state which not in a good condition can be more influential on the disease. Aaaah, uri Junsu is always cheerful, always wanted to make us smile and laugh, turned out to hide his own grief. I so remember that night, when Junsu suddenly crying so deeply. 'Why all this time I just enjoy the fun of teasing and jokes him, too less attention to the condition in his deeply heart?' I regret in my heart.

"Junsu, why agiya.... became like this?? Wake up dear," Junsu eui eoma soon arrived, sobbing as she stroked his cheek... Yoochun  and I can't say anything, just only see it moved.

"Junho, Appa would talk to the doctor. You just accompany eomma  here," Junsu eui aboji out.

"Ne, Appa," said Junho bowed.


Junsu in a coma news spread quickly, honest fans in various countries is very sad to hear that. "Junsu Oppa ... get well soon we love you... hwaiting.... saranghae…. speedy recovery..... " various sites and blogs and the media was filled with fans' expressions of sadness and hoping, especially Xiahsoul. Even there are the Xiah's fans who reportedly have not  appetite to eat because of sadly hear Junsu's sickness. And reportedly also a special site that video publishers are inundated with videos of hope and encouragement to Junsu made by the fans. Again and again the fans who always gives great support when we were in sad or trouble.

Day after day, a  single week... two weeks... Junsu had not regained consciousness, the schedule of our new album launch in Japan was delayed. But based on statements from various fan sites and blogs, they can understand and the only hope of healing Junsu is the most important to them. Yunho and Changmin still busy themselves, Changmin had once visited it, but Yunho instead to China for  his duet single album promo  schedule. It makes me more upset to Yunho.

"Annyeonghaseyo hyeong, want to see my brother?" Junho asked when I met him and his mother in the hospital corridor.

"Ne, I want to accompany him this evening," I replied with a bow on them.

"Gomawo, I just drove eoma home. Changmin has come too, he's in the room. Please take care of my brother, O.K? I'll be back," said Junho.

"Ne, eomeonim health too,  you also need to rest."

"Ne, Jaejoong ssi gomawo. Please take care uri Junsu," Junsu's eoma replied.


"Geurom, annyeonghi gyeshipshiyo," they said.

"Annyeonghi gashipshiyo," I said again, taking off they go. I continued my pace towards the Junsu hospitalization.

"Uh, you come," I say pretending not to know when see Changmin.

"Ne, I tried to escape first. Although the management tried to pack the shooting schedule so I did not have time to come, fortunately the crew and the other players could understand and help me to find a reason to break a long shot," Changmin said, he looked tired, lack of sleep.

"Good," I nodded,  less enthusiasm.

The door is open, "Annyeong," said YooChun, "Changmin~aaa, you run  away here. Haaa, you look more skinny. You have to more eat and rest, don't like Junsu,"  patted Changmin's shoulder .

"Yeah, moreover you alone," I mean alone without us. Changmin just grinned.

"Hyeong, how  was Junsu hyeong condition development?" Changmin asked to sit back on Junsu's bedside.

"Phisycly, everything was much better. But the doctors also wonder why he had not regained consciousness, like people who sleep too soundly, he said. Perhaps his subconscious that made him not want to realized, so we have to encourage him, to let him come back," I replied, looking at the face of the 'baby'  who's sleeping.

"Mmmh, geure? Why he had not realized yet?? " Changmin asked back.

"Hyeong, how if we record the whishes support videos of the fans and then we show him ... I mean....  we turn on beside Junsu? So that he can listen it,"  Yoochun ideas.

"That's a good idea!" Changmin said.

"Mmmmh, we should try," I replied.

Then we run the idea, download the videos supporting by the fans. Even the local fan clubs with fans from various countries 'joined' to make a special video project which they named the project "Junsu Hwaiting!' which they recorded and send it to us. Again and again YooChun touched and could not hold back the tears, "Yeorobeun, saranghamnida hiks... hiks…  hiks.... we love you all .... you are our everything ... " he whispered act melancholy.


"Hyaaaa, lazy!  Get up, don't just sleeping! Are you waiting for a beautiful princess who will kissed you, so that you want to wake up?" YooChun jeered, "Then I'd better just to kiss you, spoiled you!" YooChun act to kiss Junsu with pursed lips. I just shook  to see his attitude. Junsu was still absorbed in the his own dream.

Every day we tried to wake our 'big baby' who's sleeping, and keep listened him the recordings of the fans one by one containing the words  'Hwaitiiiiiiing Junsu Oppa!', 'Saranghaeeeeee Junsu Oppa!', deung - deung (etc). Not only that, in many ways we try... tickling him, teasing out - hell, telling funny nearby but the child still was not awake.

"Junsu hyeong, geugo arayo?! While you're sleeping," Changmin poetic self of Junsu whispered into his ear, " There is fortunately for me, too... he... he.... I was never sick again because of roaring laughter  with your 'crispy' jokes," he grinned, "But I'm afraid my stomach muscles won't grew up sexy anymore because it's mean that I'll so rarely 'practice' more ... " silence.

Changmin ran out of the words, YooChun threw his body on the couch accompanied by a sigh breath, surrender. I also stood beside the bed, staring at Junsu's face, hoping he suddenly wake up and mocked us, 'Eu kyang kyang .. I got you... bweo!' as he stuck his tongue out cute ass. But he's still 'sleeping' accompanied by the sound of device (whatever its name) which regularly beats .... nut… nut… nut ...

"Hyeongdeul.... what if he did not get up again?" suddenly Changmin so melancholy, "I have not even seen him, last time we met was not as intimate atmosphere yet," Changmin could not hold back his  tears.

"Actually, that night, the last night before he's down, he vent and cry,"  I so could not restrain my tears, too,  "He missed and wanted to see Yunho and you. He was very sad because we are so far apart lately. "

" Hwaaaa....!" Yoochun cry.

"Yunho hyeong already came here?" asked Changmin.

"Ajik ... he's still busy in China," replied lazily.

"Hyeong, maybe if Yunho hyeong came, Junsu would wake up," Yoochun seem to find hope.

"I hope so, but when he'll come? Always act too busy," I muttered irritably.

"No, not really, Yunho hyeong did't never try to see Junsu hyeong, but it is not possible," defense Changmin.

I and Yoochun  sighed compact, still upset.

"Aha ....! I have an idea!" said Yoochun immedietely, he was shaking his finger, motioning for us to put  our ear to listen him. Yoochun whispered something into our ears.

We exclaimed, "Mwo ...?!!!" compact.

***to be continued…***

FanFic Title       :      You Are My Everything

Chapter             :      1/20

Genre               :      Romance, Friendship

Main Cast         :      Kim Junsu, Kim Jaejoong, Park Yoochun, Shim Changmin, Jung Yunho

Author              :      아야 비루나시아 (Aya BirunaXiah)


Annyeong :) this is my first TVXQ fanfic that I ever have. I try to translate to English as I can. I dedicated this FF to our precious TVXQ, I'm proud of their friendship and brothership. I dedicated this to Cassiopeia too. Sorry for my poor English, I've try my best. Have a nice reading ^_^


Finally, I can step back to the floor of this house after pacing Canada - Japan - Korea a few weeks. Our house is now five of the occupants rarely complete, after we felt so tired sweat under the management of entertainment companies. Concert schedule, recordings, drama shooting, and added other activities so crowded until sleep was often no chance. But the work and our hard work is not appreciated them properly, and they are highly profitable lot, yes they enjoy our sweat. After a long  time in this condition, we tired, eventually demanding them through legal channels.

Anio, not us.... just me with Junsu and YooChun. Changmin and Yunho decided to not join this case, Changmin had a contract with the company's film and Yunho .... I'm beginning to understand because at that moment he was busy shooting a drama series. But it is silent - still also has a contract with the company's sly to make a mini album, a duet by a member of the Korean girlband who is now famous in Asia. He did it silency, that can not forgive, how can he was not frank with us? Is it because he felt as good leader??!

"Yoochun~aaa! Turn off air conditioning, jebaaaaaal?! I really - really cold, it's gyeoul anyways ..... huh?!" shouted Junsu, Yoochun seems to have fallen asleep behind the quilt. But if the air conditioning turned off, he'll get up and complain noisy heat, even more disturbing us.

"Double it with Changmin's blanket," I said, throwing Changmin's blanket which the bed was close to me. Junsu tried to sleep with two layers of thick blankets, when I saw his shirt was covered - layers. Usually he is not too fussy with the Yoochun's 'odd habits' lit during cooler though it's winter, but it seems he was not vit.

"Aaah well! I can not stand. I sleep in the living room alone, " Junsu said as he left the room with a thick blanket wrapped.

"Ne," I replied curtly.

Actually I could not sleep, though this body was so tired. My mind still wanders here and there. Aaah, it's almost mid-January. Soon, my birthday. Demands to the company's problems had not been too cunning to find a bright spot, they have even more control of Changmin and Yunho and make rumors that we really disbanded. Although because of it, my relationship, Junsu and  Yoochun with HoMin had a little stiff. Haaaah! Stop! I must get to bed. Tomorrow morning there will a fans meeting of my first drama.


"Mwo?!! Junsu? Where? Ne, algyeseumnida..." I have just reached the front of door, the news shocked me. I rushed to the Gangnam hospital and called Yoochun to follow immediately. Well, I told him to take rest at least a day for his own good, but Junsu also forced to go with a pale face this morning. He's been preparing for his appearance on the musical stage show as the main role, in addition to preparing the launch of a new single and our best album we in Japan.

"You're so stubborn! I told you so," Yoochun came, act to knocked Junsu's head who's lying in the bed weakly.

"Ah ... aaaaakh! You're not have feelings, I'm sick but you still knock my head!" Junsu still trying to answer the expense of his 'enemy'  although he's in a very weak body.

"Kya, I'm a real man. The real man not use the feeling, but use the sense!" Yoochun replied while wiping his wide forehead.

"Mwo?! You think I'm not the real man??" Junsu replied in time.

"Kya... You've act strong evidence, but fallen at last. If like this, so you can not even work, can you? " Yoochun don't want to lose.

"Eeeeh! Just enough! This husband - wife, just stop fighting! Yoochuna, just let him rest a minute!" I  put my hand over her mouth.

"Mmmmh..... mian mian! I'm just kidding!" Yoochun release my covered hand.

"Yeah, do not take a joke anymore with the sick person," I dragged him to the couch in Junsu's hospitalized room.

"You just go to bed, Su. You have to take more rest," I approached the bed and raised the blanket to Junsu's body. Junsu just smiled quietly again, because it seems he was right - completely limp and his head still pain.

After undergoing several tests, doctors said that Junsu infected with the virus because of fatigue that made her body weak and cause severe pain in his head. I do not know, I do not really understand the terms of medic, and it seems I've never heard this kind of disease. But the point is, the disease is not dangerous if Junsu getting treatment, and adequate rest. 'Haaah, tahengida ...' I thought a bit relieved. Junsu is one of the 'treasure' valuable in my life, he's like my own brother. Especially in the relationship with the other siblings are estranged, I am more aware of how precious they four to me. Even though how angry I am, I still love them anyways.

After one week of treatment in hospitals, Junsu wants to take the outpatiens care only because the stage musical is near. He did not want to disappoint cassiopeians who's very looking forward his appearance. Huuuft, Junsu had always wanted to make the others smile, though his own condition  was not so good. One thing that I regret, though I tried to contact repeatedly, Yunho and Changmin keep busy with their work. During this week,  they even not appeared to visit Junsu.

"It's O.K  hyung, I'm allright now. Don't bother, they must be very busy. Moreover we know how the company management's threating was? They would always try to prevent us together," said Junsu wisely, though I knew from the look on his face there was a disappointment. He once said he wanted be together  again, not because of work. Our last meeting with the MinHo in Japan for the making of our new single MV, felt a little stiff, not as warm as it used to be. Even Junsu  too awkward to make the jokes or a matter of our expense again.


That night, after the closing of Junsu's stage musical starring. I and YooChun joined together in the celebrating party for the success of the Musical Stage with the supporters and crew event. As usual, Yoochun always lost his self control when he meet alcohol, he finally drunk. Luckily I had anticipated only drink a little, so I thought that I could be take him to go home. But Junsu who's can stand of alcohol, follow to drink a little, he said just to respect others. But even a little, he was drunk. Fortunately Tae Gun was there, so he was turn to carry   Junsu and I have to carry Yoochun.

After  drove up Tae Gun to the front door, I returned to our room. Junsu was talking himself, haven't been sleep yet, while Yoochun has been 'flying' into the dreamland. I tried to lay my body.

"Hyuuuung ..... geugo arayo??"  suddenly Junsu risen.

"Ne ..?" I asked.

"Jaejoong~aaa, anio…Jaejoong  hyeong??" Junsu was still a little drunk.

"Ne ..??"  I still lying.

"Actually, though I rarely call you 'hyung' again ...... I still respect you ....."

"Ne, arasseoyo," I replied, nodding while sleep turned my body.

"He ... he ... he ... tahengida," said Junsu. There was no voice anymore, maybe he was asleep, I thought.

I almost falling asleep, when I heard heavy sobs.

"Wae?? What's wrong??" I  immediately rose and sat up next to Junsu because he had never cried like this, "APHA??" I'm so worried because Junsu's health had not so improved in fact.

"Gaseumi aphayo ..."

"Wae??" I asked curiously.

"Nan jengmal seulpeuyo ...."

"Wae seulpeuyo? Don't you got a big success in the musical stage?"  I'm more curious, "Aaaah, the case against the company. Geokchonghajima, even though we lost thanks to their cunning, we're dealing with ...." try to comfort him.

"It's not a very big problem, which makes me very sad and scared are losing our brotherhood... hyeong, Yoochuni, Changmini, Yunho hyeong," added Junsu sobbed, "What if we could not close the same way again??"

"Geokchonghajima ..." comfort him again. Actually I also wanted to cry after hear this, for some reason, I felt Junsu was down. Usually he's always been the source of our joy, even if he sad, he would not cry as deeply as this.

"Jaejoong hyeong, I felt like to a long sleep. I'm tired, if we could not be the same again, "  Junsu came  to hug me and take my body shook with his tears,  "I really wanted to meet Changmin and Yunho hyeong again..... if I can not see them again, I seem not want to get up again, I won't still alive anymore. "

"Haiss, what do you talking about?! Of course we could meet them again, our new single was released and soon the Japan's best album," comfort him, I felt strange to hear his words, "Come on, now better you just sleep. You're a little fever again, take the medicine first. "

After taking medicine, Junsu finally fell asleep. I immediately lay down my back.

In the morning as usual when a little spare time, I cooked breakfast for all of us, anio this time... the three of us. As usual too, YooChun hard to wake up, until I'm back and forth-back room to wake him. Junsu, I deliberately did not wake him first, he must be tired at all and his body began to fever again last night, so I let him rest. Apparently asleep once,  maybe the drugs are taken overnight.

"Ppalli ..!! Just take a bath, I have prepared breakfast," I returned to the dining room.

"Ne, eomaaaaaaa!" scoffed Yoochun long yawn and stretch. Hah, he finally woke up.

"Hyeooong, why don't you wake Junsu?" asked YooChun out of the bathroom.

"Let him rest. I think he's not feeling well again," I said, smoothing down the kitchen.

"Mmmmh,"  Yoochun nodded as he left the room.

"Junsu yaaaa?!! Junsu! Ireonaaabwa!!" soon, I heard Yoochun shouted panicly, "Jaejoong hyeong... Hyeooong?! Junsuga ....!!"

I immediately went into the room no matter what it's straightened plates shattered on the floor. I found Yoochun was shaking Junsu's body who lying motionless limp on the bed.

"Junsu yaaaa ....!!!"

***to be continued…***

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